Showing of expression have levels and capability. Some people are lavish in the way they give and express affection while some are reserve. The reserve type believes the other person should know without much display of affection that he/she is loved, while the open and lavish type believes in much expression for the other person to know he/she is loved. If you are the reserved type for example and your spouse is the open type, you might need to adjust a bit to his/her type or he/she adjust to yours, else the open type may feel neglected by the reserved type most of the times. Again, the reserved spouse can feel uncomfortable with the open display of affection by the lavish type most of the time also.
Couples, you should remember that this incompatibility could be resolved by accurate communication and compromise.
Most of the challenges in marriage can be resolved by accurate communication, nothing can go wrong with couples that constantly communicate accurately with consideration to compromise in area where there are differences.
TAKE NOTE OF SEXUAL CHEMISTRY
This is another aspect you must handle carefully, most especially as a man because it may determine at long run your affection and joy you have towards your spouse.
It is my advice you look beyond physical for what makes your spouse unique.
Read also: how to sustain love and affection for each other as a couple – first post.
Sexual chemistry is the chemistry that is mostly at play when we first get attracted to the opposite sex. There is always that initial sexual blaze which could have been set on by simple features such as the opposite sex’s eyes, nose, lips, size of breast, shape, set of denture, smile, skin complexion, gestures, carriage, confidence level and so on.
WHAT PSYCHOLOGISTS SAYS ABOUT SEXUAL CHEMISTRY
Psychologists have found out that six months is the point of which the blaze of sexual chemistry usually begins to fade. They said no matter how strong the initial attraction is, it is almost inevitable that chemistry will wear off sometimes between 6 months and 3 years. This is one of the reasons stated why some people could not sustain a relationship longer than a year or so.
People jump from one person to another wrongly basing their love on the first strong attraction they felt towards the other person which is mostly sexual chemistry. When the chemistry fades away – which is meant to happen, they conclude they are no longer in love with their spouse.
If you are a couple and you are reading this, by now you should understand the feeling. It is just sexual chemistry that is troubling you not your spouse.
As you can see, I have many things to teach you; I suggest you refer singles, preparing for wedding to this site. They have to know some of these things before it consume them in their marriage.
Read also: things that could quench fire of love / affection in your marriage- how to avoid it.
Spouse will feel that the love they have for each other has grown cold as the attraction they initially felt for each other has faded.
Many people lack this knowledge and whenever this happened to them, they begin to search for another attraction which will begin the circle of between 6 months to 3years again and so on. (This is one major cause of adultery).
A SEARCH FOR PERMANENT CHEMISTRY IS HOPELESS
Couples need to know that search for permanent chemistry is hopeless. True chemistry is between our head and not below our waistline. This explains why couples cheat on their wives or husbands. They feel there is another man or another woman outside there, which is now more attractive than the husband or wife. If you go by this psychological explanation, you will see that they are embarking on an endless and hopeless journey because sooner than later, they will still realize that the same chemistry will fade away and that the husband or the wife is just the best. To some, they actually realized this too late and they regret of never to have adopted self control and patient.
Now you are married, do not think that you are no more in love or that your spouse does not look attractive again, it is just sexual chemistry that is at work at its decreasing rate
My advice is get more interested about what interest you in your spouse, let there be more emphasis on what to do to enhance the life and capacity of your wife or husband instead of going into your shell and imagining you are no more in love.
It is very true even the law of nature tells us that when you get use to a thing, it may gradually lose its value and the interest attached to it at initial stage, etc. In marriage beware of this and concentrate on how to better your life and the life of your partner together.
The bible has this to say that “when your eyes are single, your whole body will be full of light”. When you are married you need to be focused, you need to know that the responsibility to make this work is on you the man and you the wife.
Read: How To Avoid The Marriage Killer Sense – The Tribal Sense
How To Avoid Painful Heart Break As A Youth
Watch out also: Tips on How to Safeguard Your
Virginity as Singles during Your First Love